Wednesday, 1 December 2010

The Silly Old Daniel Celebrity Roundup.

Last night I went to Metro Radio Live to commemorate the 15th year of the Metro Radio Arena. It was bloody good, but there is something I do not understand and that is the hysteria currently surrounding The Wanted. I just don't fancy them at all, only one of them is actually good-looking and he has such a smug look on his face I couldn't imagine even coming close to being attracted to him. After the concert Kate and I spent a great deal of time wandering around Newcastle and Gateshead trying to find a taxi. My whole face was numb by the time we actually found one, two hours after the concert officially ended. There was so much snow in my impractical boots by the time I got home I'd have been better off taking them off and walking around barefoot, let me tell you. So anyway, celebrities. They're continuing to do stuff. Here is some of that stuff in today's Silly Old Daniel Celebrity Roundup...

1. It's a good week to get booed. (Perez Hilton)


It looks like people aren't forgiving their favourite celebrity dickheads any time soon. He might make things worse by claiming Taylor Swift should have stuck up for him, but I'm starting to feel really sorry for Kanye West. He did something really stupid when he humiliated Taylor at the VMAs, but it was a hundred years ago- surely it's time to put the whole thing behind us and move on?

Either way, Kanye was a part of the annual Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade to promote his new album My Dark Twisted Fantasy, but it's safe to say the New York crowd weren't best pleased to see the R&B star. As his float passed by them crowds started to boo and jeer, with one member of the rabble even hollering "Hey Kanye! Jump!" Now I'm all for people getting their comeuppance, but Kanye has apologised and apologised for Taylor-gate a hundred times, surely things like this shouldn't still be happening?:



As if one helping of celebrity booing wasn't enough, I'm not finished! We all know I don't follow the football. Or, as some would say, the soccer. The footie. Eleven-a-side. Footer. The beautiful game. So anyway, I don't follow it. But this weekend it was a big match between Chelsea and Newcastle, which turned into a bit of an ordeal for Chelsea player Ashley Cole.

You might have forgotten, but Ashley Cole has been a bit of a twat in recent times. You see, he was married to Cheryl Cole until quite recently, and as you know she is the most amazing woman in the UK at this moment in time. The thing is, he decided to break her heart by cheating on her with every tart who would open their legs for him, and if you ask me that sort of thing isn't socially acceptable. And more importantly, the people of Newcastle don't think that's socially acceptable either. Cheryl is our star, you see. So every time Ashley got the ball in Sunday's game, the crowds decided to boo. That'll teach him. An amazing piece of unity on behalf of the people of Newcastle. Well done, Newcastle fans. Don't beat me up.

2. I love Susan Boyle. (Daily Mail)


Did anyone see Susan Boyle on Piers Morgan's talk show the other week? I absolutely fell in love with her, I think she is so inspiring the way she's been put down all her life, and only now in her late 40s has she showed people what she's capable of. Plus I think she seems like a right laugh, and she is so very talented. She looks a lot like my friend Catherine as well, which is nice.

So anyway, Susan was on The View this week performing O, Holy Night (cheery little festive number) except during the performance she got a "frog in her throat" and ended up cocking the whole thing right up and stopping half-way through. Poor lamb. LET'S WATCH:



Why must Whoopi Goldberg dress like a homeless person?

3. Could Cheryl's past hold back her future? (Visa Bureau)


It's been all but confirmed that when Simon Cowell re-launches The X Factor next year in America, that he's got a £3million deal in place to get Cheryl Cole on board with him. Sources reckon that Cheryl is chuffed about the move, because it means she'll get to spend more time in LA with her "special friend" Derek Hough (*hums the theme from Will & Grace*). Presumably she's dying to spend more time with Nadine Coyle as well.

Thing is though, a few years ago Cheryl was a bit naughty and clouted a toilet attendant round the chops for not giving her enough lollipops. The nation's sweetheart's reputation was forever tarnished because of lollipops. Thing is, though, Cheryl was found guilty of actual bodily harm and forced to do community service after the incident (she was found not guilty of having racist motivations, mind you, which is something people often forget about) which could cause problems for her visa.

According to the official US visa bureau website (which, apparently, now has a celebrity news section which gay teenagers can use to source their blogs), any past convictions must be stated on your visa application, although minor convictions can often be overlooked. In the past Russell Brand and Amy Winehouse have both had problems obtaining visas due to past criminal convictions, with the latter having to perform her song Love Is A Losing Game at the Grammy awards via video-link. Perhaps they'll just have to get a hologram of Cheryl to sit next to Simon on the panel, crying hysterically and telling acts they're right up her street.

Ends.
Yee-haw.

6 comments:

  1. BRILLIANT round up!
    However you forgot to mention that one of Kanye's 'gold ladies' in that picture is from JARROW! (http://www.sundaysun.co.uk/whats-on-newcastle-north-east/celebrity-showbiz-news/2006/02/19/goldie-lookin-fame-79310-16721962/) ;DD

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  2. ARE YOU ACTUALLY FOR REAL??????????? :O

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  3. YEAH it's Jamilah's sister! (there's a vid of us all as kids on my FB) :)

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  4. You know, aside from a few anglophile gay boys with blogs Cheryl Cole is pretty much completely unknown in the U.S. I can't see how anybody is going to consider her a credible judge. But I rather have her than Louis Walsh. He makes me want to renounce my Irish heritage.

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  5. Oooh that's interesting, Perez proper loves Cheryl so do you not think she'll transfer well overseas? The media have kind of turned on her as of late, so if she moves to LA and it's a flop then she will get eaten alive when she comes home with her tail between her legs, if I were her I wouldn't go to be honest.

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  6. I double checked and neither Girls Aloud or Cheryl as a solo artist has ever had a U.S. chart hit. But I don't know. She's pretty and personable, so maybe she'll be accepted.

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